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"Robin Hood" (2006) |
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Yapım : 2006 Ülke : İngiltere Tür : Adventure  IMDB ID: tt0787985 |
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Bilgi :In the middle of an unnamed (but presumably Sherwood) forest, Allan A-Dale (Joe Armstrong) is caught poaching deer by a mounted posse of the king's men. Rather than lose a hand at a trial that he would lose, Alan initially accepts the lesser punishment of (shock, horror) losing a finger. Presumably in a time of dysentry, disease and malnourishment where anyone making it to 40 years of age was rare, losing a finger is supposed to raise gasps of disbelief from the audience. Enter Robin of Locksley (Jonas Armstrong - presumably no relation) with the coolest hood I've ever seen which opens at both ends. Any expectation of something vaguely realistic vanished as Robin shoots a number of arrows between the fingers of an spread hand from over thirty feet away before launching an arrow high in the sky that seconds later drops into the saddle of the leader of the horsemen. Oh-for-god's-sake was my reaction if I recall correctly.
Robin is back from the crusades, presumably having gone to the holy land when he was about twelve. He is accompanied by Much (Sam Troughton), his bondsman, court jester and predictable butt-of-many-jokes. Much is grateful to his master for making him a freeman, which no doubt is why he is endlessly fawning over Robin, kissing his backside and occasionally dry-humping his leg. (Ok, I made that last bit up - but you get the idea). I started counting until our first buxom young girl with loose morals, and sure enough - I got to about sixty before one made an appearence.
The dynamic duo made the shocking discovery that Robin's estate is being "managed" by Sir Guy of Gisbourne (Richard Armitage) who does a natty line in black leather armour. Gisbourne is the right hand villain of the new Sheriff of Nottingham (Keith Allen) who actually manages the unthinkable - a bad performance. Oozing evil in a way not seen since the days of vaudeville, it is a shame that steam power has yet to be invented as he has no train tracks to tie virgins to. With Gisbourne a'courtin' Maid Marian (Lucy Griffiths) who is as expected, "Feisty" and "Brave" and "Proud". Did'nt see that coming, eh? - and the Sheriff about to hang several of Robin's peasants, it is time to shoot ropes and escape with slo-mo ease into the greensward. |
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